A week of flashing, and I'm off kilter. I don't mind the sensation, so much, really. It's that I'm awake every hour or so through the night, not resting well, waking drugged as well as damp. The sweat mostly from my elbow pits (antecubital space.) Which is simply weird. Palms of my hands, soles of my feet radiant. Throw off covers, doze, wake again - freezing. Cover back up. Nap. Repeat.
I've never been much good when short of sleep. I love sleep. A comfort and a refuge. Disturbed sleep is profoundly unsettling to my sense of well being.
Strange and convincing dreams involving warm, carved marble seats, dogs needing the tops of their noses scritched, cats running on circular foot pedals, and me visiting kids to return something. Woke to Eleanor pressed in beside me.
Off work for four solid days, planned mental health days. On the 5th day, I have to go in for a big meeting in the morning, but then I'm off the rest of the day. Knowing this made yesterday entirely bearable, even when it ran long. Politics swirling there, so I keep my head down and stay cheery. Twanged my poor finger a couple of times. Today, nothing more strenuous than the keyboard for sore hand. Perhaps a trip to the Farmer's Market.
4 comments:
I think most of us have trouble when our sleep is so poor. I hope for you it gets better.
Are mental health off days a regular occurrence in your 'industry'?
Phil,
In large places, they are the unacknowledged most common type of sick day. In small places, they need to be scheduled, but still aren't called that.
I'm also needing all my sleep and usually I get it. I used to feel grief if I couldn't get a full night's sleep. I try not to be so self pitying now. But I don't always succeed.
Nimble,
That's ok, especially when you are short on sleep. I'm not at my most rational then, either.
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