Alone

I've never minded eating alone. No one was going to yell at me if I ate alone. I could read a book if I ate alone. No brother would make me giggle until I threw up milk out my nose if I ate alone. No other kid would get mean or mock my brown bag when I ate alone. A teacher once was very concerned about this, afraid I was being ostracized and bullied. I was, but mostly at home, and I was not particularly being shunned at lunch at school. Completely content to take my food off to an empty table and read as I ate.

No parent would correct my manners, nor any relative comment on my eating when I ate alone. No work politics, if I ate alone. I could skip food I didn't like if I ate alone, but once on my plate, I couldn't push it aside if the cook sat across the table from me, eager to see that I liked it. So, especially as an adult, I tended not to take much, preferring to be hungry rather than have to waste food or insult my host, (in-laws for instance) or eat something I didn't like.

And I ate fast, after a while. My much older brothers "raced" me eating, and always won. Especially when I could barely choke down the food I was given. I eventually made up for time, and swallowed without tasting as much as possible. Came in handy in Basic, when the Drills shouted us out "IF you can Taste it you are EATING TOO SLOW!" I was always the first done, with the reward of a few minutes by myself to walk back to the barracks and have the toilet to myself.

We still eat too fast, both of us. We do eat together, which is comforting, but often watching a show, or reading as we chew. It's as good as eating alone, but with pleasant company. Have to clean up for two, though.