Armistice

I'm a veteran, of a sort. I did my years, fulfilled my service as agreed, went to a foreign war and did as expected. Raised my hand, and made no attempt to get out of my responsibility. As a result, I met D, got about half of nursing school paid for, and changed my life from the ground up. I'm eligible for a VA home loan and they are supposed to bury me.


I've never considered myself a soldier, although technically I certainly filled that slot. I shot an M16, wore the uniform, and was prepared to follow orders, if not happy to do so. Because I was only enlisted National Guard/Reserve, I do not get the same benefits as a Regular military member, even though counting the days of my six years, I did the full two years worth of a regular Army member. Fair? Ha, like anything about being in has any relationship to "fair." A female vet, to boot, which also doesn't quite count. Medical, which is even softer on the scale.

My brother is retired Air Force, served during Vietnam, mostly in Thailand fixing jets. Most of my uncles on my mother's side served in the Canadian forces, one on subs out for U-boats in the St. Lawrence.

Considering that most military service members are support, not combat, I'm actually pretty typical. At risk, but not front line. In trench warfare, which the 11/11 date, Armistice Day as was, commemorates, no one was safe, everyone was a combatant, and target. Survival in the face of such dire circumstances, disease and firepower, could easily be seen as simply miraculous. No one emerged unscathed. Other wars played out variously for individuals, as well as different countries.

I don't, therefore, get all squishy about vets as a totality. Just being in the path of ordinance does not mean valor. Valor is not the best of human qualities, either. That those who put their lives on the line get treated like crap bothers me. They get the worst health care, treated like cowards for the after effects of concussion and battle, jailed and discarded. A society that takes it's young, often already grasping for otherwise unavailable opportunity to better themselves, asks them to murder for the failure of politics, then makes no, or only feeble, attempts to reintegrate them into society, reaps what it sows. I have no illusions that many soldiers are not our best and brightest, but, as the happy phrase goes, joining the Army or going to jail. I was among them, I was one of them. Poor and with limited options, I joined for the income and access to funds for school.

I came away with much more than I expected. Mostly because of the people I got to know, a real cross section of this country. With time to talk, without preconceptions, to everyone. I got to know a couple of criminals, though I didn't know it at the time. I found wonderful friends who I would trust with my life. And one I live beside and love down to my soles.

Don't thank me, it was nothing noble, nothing even worthwhile. I got what I could out of the institution and made the most of it. I never saw combat. I no longer have nightmares. I sustained no injuries. I was in it, I was not of it.