(As not wanted on an anthology site.)
The floor gives a little under me, the skin of my feet slide along subtle sags in a surface linear, wooden. Do I imagine old, stale pine tang? Or just the cleaner, wax or linseed oil, applied long ago. A faint breath of cool air comes up from the floor, too indecisive to offer directions, tweaking my nose, not brushing my cheek. I reach out to experience only cool air. My hair hangs from my scalp, settles on my neck, pulls slightly on my temple. My glasses are gone. I know I stand, but my balance does a double check, a little uncertain, adjusting with subtle pull of muscle against tendon against bone. Cotton knit drapes over my shoulders, slides over my breasts as I breathe. Dry air in my nostrils, harshing through sinuses. I keep my mouth stuck closed, lips dry and adhesive. My eyes happen to be closed, but it would make no difference. I encounter walls, painted plaster, a particular give. A light switch, I move the hard square toggle, to no illumination. I kick a table, my hands discover a lampshade, a chain, but no light reacts to the pull on the string of tiny metal balls burbling through my fingertips. A sinuous furry warmth insinuates around bare ankles, bare feet. A cat? A rat? I feel a furry tail, curling,shoving marking me.
There is no sound aside from my own breathing, a sense of the space of the room, which changes from echoing hall to close bedroom, all I touch are air or walls, more switches, hard nubbins against flat shiny plates, all useless.
This is my dream, my nightmare, of darkness and darkness, no light to be had. Only my own heartbeat, my own body, endless searching for illumination.
8 comments:
You describe the darkness of the room very well.
Ever been in a cave with all lights off? Darkness blinds you, crawls down your ears and up your nose, tastes thick. No thank you ever again.
The work photos have been great.
My mouth went dry reading this.
God I hate those dreams. Smells are rare in mine though.
(I'd have accepted it)
Ooh that's dark. But I like the furry tail wrapping your ankles.
I used to have that dream where the lights don't come on when you press the switch. Again and again. Awful. It was comforting to learn that L had it too. And you... We're not alone after all...
(o)
Whoa, my greatest fear of darkness is that it may be permanent, of being blind!
mbick,
I have been in a cave without light. Very disorienting, but strangely comforting, I thought. I cannot explain why, and it was only for a minute, on tours of caverns.
H, ah.
L, yeah, the smell thing is rare for me as well, but not unknown.
po,
might be a furry rat...
tg, no, not alone. Except in the dream, and in the final moments. Even so, we all walk that road at different moments.
m-l, Strange, I fantasized being blind as a kid, wanting to sharpen my other senses, hear and feel more intensely. Endlessly debated whether I could better lose my sight or my hearing. Weird things kids think about.
Post a Comment