Screen

Listening to KRCL live. Charge RN brought in a pack of stick on green moustaches! I wore one on the mandatory* mask for the door screeners.



Planted the shamrocks, added the previous owner's much abused fire screen to moderate high desert sunlight.

Went in this morning, since I was not told specifically not to. They were going to send me home, then needed someone at one of the only two doors unlocked. I screened and directed people for a couple of hours. I don't mind, but it's perhaps not the best use of hospital funds to use an RN as a door greeter. Everyone is drifting between shrugging cheerfully and mildly irritated resignation. I'll be offering my time to do phone screening later today, not going in for the next couple of weeks. I can afford nearly two months just with my accrued time off, assuming they don't offer anything else.

Stopped at Trader Joes on my way home. Big sign saying "We're all in this together" and not to take more than two of any item, and not more than one cart full. While they weren't fully stocked, there was enough. I picked up more tinned herring, shelf stable cream, frozen meals, and our normal groceries, three bags worth. Didn't use a cart at all. And a half gallon of milk for our neighbor, who got gouged at the big grocery store, and was worried about getting more. He wanted to pay me, I refused.


Reading Ghosts of the Tsunami, perspective.

The big wave heaving
Roaring silent destruction
Are we high enough?


*It'll stop some droplets if someone coughs at. Not much help, but more is overkill in this situation. Just wash your hands well. With soap.

Kibosh

I was terrified of piranhas as a kid. Recurring nightmares of my toes in shallow water, bitten off by fish, specifically piranhas. Turns out, I need not have worried.

Got to work this morning, and the full, four room schedule, 16-20 cases, had evaporated to two cases total. Our disinfecting wipes were stolen over the weekend. So, to reserve supplies, only urgent cases will be done. Fractures, injuries that would inflict lasting damage or pain, that sort of thing. I checked my accrued time off, and should be fine.




So, got home, ate my lunch, and decided to do the paint wash on the red (before us painted brick), like I wanted to do last fall. My wrist snapping put the kibosh on that plan. Today, I got on it. I'm pleased, but it's very different, and I have to get used to it. It's not completed, I've learned when to quit for the day. Need to trim back the bush before I do the last corner.


I find myself in semi-permanent waiting for trauma case mode. A kind of prep-and-be-still, open a fresh empty page, breathe quietly. In Basic, the drill sergeants hammered into us not to anticipate. Wait for the order, specifically in drill, react when 'forward march' is given, and not before. I wait for green lights with the same sense of mind. Or for the patient to roll in, or the surgeon to answer the question I asked an hour before. Not knowing what my role will be in the current events, only that I will be doing something, has me feeling blank.

Careful

The problem with irrational panic and hoarding, is that once it starts, everyone gets swept along whatever they are thinking. If you want any food when people are clearing out shelves, you have to grab some as well no matter what you are thinking. The cashiers as we were checking out were talking about the size of the expected shipment they'd be unpacking the next day. We joked with them about the panic. We will slowly build up our reserve, especially of protein foods.

Friends over this evening, good food to share. We are all feeling careful, reasonably. Watched the first episode of Blackstone, and will not return to it. It's excellent, but devastatingly grim. Had to watch an episode of Partners in Crime to face the world again. Intelligent, funny, kind people, we are so fortunate to have found them.

Zeppo came out and face rubbed on Nicole's shoulder, then scampered off. Eleanor walked all over everyone and got lots of attention.

Rust

Photos.


For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat. I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink. I was a stranger, and ye took me in.

Naked, and ye clothed me. I was sick, and ye visited me. I was in prison, and ye came unto me.

On the Vanity of Earthly Greatness

by Arthur Guiterman (1871-1943)

The tusks that clashed in mighty brawls
Of mastodons, are billiard balls.

The sword of Charlemagne the Just
Is ferric oxide, known as rust.

The grizzly bear whose potent hug
Was feared by all, is now a rug.

Great Caesar’s bust is on my shelf,
And I don’t feel so well myself.

Zeppo curled up in the crook of Dylan's elbow last evening, stayed there more than an hour.

The library is closed to the public. My community gardens class on bees is now a webinar. University classes for the rest of the semester are online. If only we already had universal basic income and universal health care. Keep thinking of The Day the Universe Changed. And Love in the Time of Cholera.

Pan

Panic in the air
Classes and events cancelled
I wait, so calmly.

"Don't just do something! Stand there."


When those around me grow frantic, I plan and dig in, erase worries, breathe. And wait for the trauma patient to roll in. This is my training, this is my nature. I worry most when no one else is. My role is to watch for the right thing to do. When there is nothing for me to do, I protect my sterile field. My mouth is closed and relaxed, in a way that makes speech reluctant.

Yes, the masks are on lockdown, because lots of boxes of masks have gone missing, and supply is already a problem. Mexico already makes a lot of our drapes, this could be a windfall for their economy.

One of our surgeons that I worked with briefly this week, has been in contact with the basketball player that is down with TheVirus. I don't think I touched him, but it is a potential vector. Dylan works with the public, the most unwashed of all, and is likewise feeling the anxiety.


So, I dug up nascent foxtail grass and planted lentils and black mustard seeds. Dig in dirt, tend my little spot of soil. Wait for signs.

The Law of Unintended Consequences is declaring a takeover, or not declaring which is more to the point. Everybody turn in your cards and pull out a random hand. The infinite improbability drive is engaged.

Watch for falling petunias. Or whales.