Went for a "Thai Yoga" massage from the massage therapy school. Excellent student, good hands, feel better. Having a very bad week with my hips.
In relation to my having four tattoos, and that I know this is considered a 'stable' number, she asked me if I did witchcraft, not completely unreasonable, given. I said no, unequivocally. Knowing about tarot and numerology and astrology is not at all the same as believing in it. I consider it being culturally educated. Like being able to quote the bible, as an agnostic. I felt as though I was talking to myself at one phase of my early adulthood, although I never went quite that far.
When I mentioned I'd done bellydance, she waxed poetic about it celebrating femininity. A neo-feminist, with an anti-male bias that she rather assumed I shared. I don't. I'm old school feminist, humanist would be a better term, although it has other meanings. Not fair to condemn men who lump all women together and insult them, then do exactly the same to men.
I don't need to dance to "feel like a woman," - as she professed she would. I've never cared about what gender I felt like, embraced being a tomboy, as long as strangers didn't actually call me a boy. This was part of why I wanted long hair, so that I could be myself, but not be mistaken for a boy. My mother tried to defend those who called me "he" by saying a boy would be more offended at being called a girl than I would being called a boy. I disagreed, and insisted that if in doubt, don't make that kind of comment at all. But the thought stayed in my head. Maybe it was true, about who would take more offense, but why? And why did it really matter so much? Maybe because so much is made of boys having to act certain ways in order to be considered men? Why is the worst insult to be called a girl, or to "scream like a girl?"
But for women who simply turn the insult back around is a childish response, showing themselves no better, no more capable of actually thinking.
Female is the default, although it is more complicated in practice. Had to insert a foley (bladder) catheter for a patient with ambiguous genitalia, which I did first try, but only because of my experience. I've seen a lot of urethras, and this structure was a bit of both sexes. The patient otherwise looked fully female. The people who live here, inbetween, are the only clues to what sex differences might mean.
We are really all more alike than we are different, and I think it's more important to unite ourselves than further widening the divide. Yes, we live in an unjust society with the male predominant, but to blame any individual man only adds to the injustice. Yes, statistically the sexes are distinct, but it's a fluid line with a lot of overlap. The balance of hormones and genes is delicate enough, throw in strong cultural imperatives, and it's a complete muddle. The experiment is contaminated beyond saving, and no definitive conclusions can be made.
What we do know is that we are all people. Start there, with compassion. With the reality we can discern. Amazed enough at the beauty around us without resorting to making stuff up.
But she did a grand job on all the tight spots, and much of the pain is gone. I can deal with the politics and soppy thinking for someone who takes some of that away.